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In the grand circus that is Florida politics, Ron DeSantis finds himself in a spectacular showdown with none other than Donald Trump—who apparently decided that endorsing marijuana is a great way to roll up the votes while puffing clouds of irony. Remember when DeSantis had the political wizard Jeff Roe in his corner? Well, it seems Roe decided to switch teams faster than a contestant on a reality TV show realizing they’ve picked the wrong partner for the tango of power.
Once the captain of the “Never Back Down” brigade—who I guess was hoping for a sequel to his fairy tale campaign—Roe is now on the front lines of a push to legalize weed in a state where smiling through the smoke is practically a badge of honor. It’s like a bad breakup episode of a political soap opera: the former besties are now frenemies, vying for the affection of a voter base that just wants to chill out with a joint and a side of irony.
Roe’s vendetta goes deeper than mere politics, with staffers fanning the flames of rivalry like they’re stoking a bonfire at a frat party. Apparently, they’ve been moonlighting as amateur psychologists—who knew campaign operatives come with a side of melodrama? “To say the feud has gotten personal would be as much of an understatement as saying Florida’s weather is a bit warm,” quipped one insider, while others nod in agreement, likely high on the thrill of the political spectacle unfolding around them.
DeSantis is now spending more political capital than a Kardashian at a luxury store, trying to squash initiatives that could save countless citizens from being cited for holding a plant that, let’s be honest, seems to be more popular than most governors right now. And as if that wasn’t enough, he’s facing a well-funded, $100 million campaign that’s pushing for legal weed, with supporters as diverse as Democrats, Independents, and Libertarians—because nothing says unity like everyone wanting to get stoned together.
Meanwhile, DeSantis has his knights on the field screaming over the potential for public spaces to smell like the kind of desperation that surrounds failing presidential aspirations. And as a cherry on this sundae of absurdity, some of DeSantis’s best buddies, those who aided in his rise, are now rolling in the dough lobbying for the very Trulieve behind the legalization effort. Oh, the tangled webs we weave when our relationships are built on political ambition and a whole lotta green.
As Roe’s firm cashes in on this initiative to the tune of $58 million while the Florida GOP stirs up the “no to marijuana” pot, it’s hard not to chuckle at the pretzel-like twist of aiming to rid the streets of something that the masses evidently crave. So here we are, folks—watching DeSantis and Roe go head-to-head in a clash that rivals any scripted reality show. If only the voters could phone in their votes from the comfort of their couches with a friendly toke in hand.
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