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In a plot twist worthy of Hollywood, the New York Yankees have officially punched their ticket to the World Series, triumphantly wrestling the Cleveland Guardians to the ground with a 5-2 victory in Game 5 of the American League Championship Series on Saturday. It seems the Yankees are back, providing strong evidence that time really does heal all wounds – or at least helps one forget a 15-year absence from the Fall Classic.
Now, while that 15-year hiatus might not seem like the lengthiest of droughts, it’s enough to make even the most patient among us start to wonder if we were watching baseball or just a really long infomercial for “How to Lose Friends and Alienate Fans.” But fear not! The Yankees managed to show up at baseball’s biggest party alongside either the Los Angeles Dodgers or the New York Mets, which sounds more like a reunion of stubborn exes than two teams vying for glory. Game six of that saga will take place Sunday night, proving again that baseball will stop at nothing to keep us entertained.
The Yankees’ journey to reclaim their glory has been fueled by some timely hitting – more timely than a delivery from Amazon Prime – from players like designated hitter Giancarlo Stanton. He might have been hitting bombs so other hitters could sit back and relax, or perhaps there’s a strange form of Morse code being sent out via home runs to ensure they can rest easy. Oh, and let’s not forget the bullpen, which chooses to be nearly perfect regularly, except, of course, for a minor hiccup in Game 3, which can only be described as a gentle suggestion to never have a meltdown.
After trailing 0-2, Stanton decided it was his time to shine, launching a two-run homer in the top of the sixth. Who knew that a little drama would turn extra innings into a Battlefield? But the grand finale came in the top of the 10th when Juan Soto, apparently auditioning for a superhero movie, smashed a three-run homer with two outs on the board. As for the Guardians? They were left pondering the existential question of “What happens when the Earth’s rotation stops and your hitters are in a slump?”
Post-match, Soto presented his PhD in Team Spirit, proclaiming the Yankees had “done a really good job here.” No kidding? I thought they just sat around drinking Gatorade and discussing their fashion choices. He praised the team’s willingness to grind – and not just on the baseball field but, presumably, in the social media comments section. “We’re feeling really good,” he declared, unaware that grittiness is not a legitimate substitute for sugar in a cupcake recipe. “We have a World Series to win.” Anyone got a calculator? He really has his work cut out for him.
Even while conspicuously absent from the World Series for more than a decade, the Yankees were practically the high school prom queens of the playoffs, making at least five championship series appearances between 2010 and 2022. One can’t help but imagine every year they cried in their pillow until someone reminded them – “Hey, you still have a chance!”
The Houston Astros have been the Yankees’ unwelcomed gatecrashers in the past championship series, reminding us all that while the Yankees may stock up on talent, sometimes it’s the scary neighbors with the full trash cans that win the block parties.
General Manager Brian Cashman joyfully exclaimed, “wherever there’s a chance to play in the World Series, it’s awesome,” as if anyone had a say in whether the universe was sending them to the biggest game of the year. He was reportedly seen giving thanks to the heavens after Soto scored like he just walked into a buffet with a ‘no limits’ sign.
Yankees manager Aaron Boone graciously congratulated the Guardians for showing up. He couldn’t help but add that his team was a tad “grittier” in the end – which, according to my marital status, is just a fancy way of saying they “tried harder,” or they had lunch with some motivational speakers.
Finishing us off, Yankees outfielder Aaron Judge, with his larger-than-life biography preparing to be penned, waxed poetic about how “that’s what it’s all about” – and between you and me, if this is all it takes to feel good, then perhaps I should start gathering my sports quotes for motivational posters.
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