Retired Athletes Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe Launch Podcast to Prove They’re Still Foul-Mouthed MVPs Off the Court

In a world where Olympic medalists Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe somehow managed to drag women’s sports into the mainstream (thanks, in part, to the exceedingly rare combo of talent, determination, and a level of sass that could put a toddler in a tantrum to shame), they’re now putting their feet up in retirement and preparing for the greatest comeback nobody asked for: a podcast! It’s titled “A Touch More with Sue Bird & Megan Rapinoe,” which sounds like a beauty tutorial but promises to deliver serious discussions on women’s sports, politics, and equality. Seriously, when did advocacy become the new Netflix?

Bird, who’s retired from the WNBA but can now add “most decorated championship hoarder” to her résumé, and Rapinoe, fresh off leading the U.S. women’s soccer team to yet another glorious World Cup victory (and also managing to dodge the pay gap like a pro), are back to talk about all things sports. Their guests range from soccer star Alex Morgan, who still has more World Cup rings than most of us have fingers, to basketball legend Dawn Staley, reminding us all that athletic prowess can also come with a splash of wisdom. Who needs a crystal ball when you have these two?

As for what they’re trying to achieve with this podcast—other than preparing the world for Bird and Rapinoe, the Power Couple of Sports—we’re told they want to inspire more investment in women’s sports. You know, something a lot of people figured out was important when they first sold out venues for women’s games way back in the early 2000s. Thanks, fans! Your demand for equality stretches back further than Rapinoe’s hairstyles.

Bird and Rapinoe can’t wait to “replace” their exhausting routines of constant training with lovely normal things, like binge-watching reality TV and eating snacks—though they claim the biggest challenge has been finding out where to put all that energy that used to fuel their elite athleticism. “Letting go of that constant pressure is nice,” Bird says, while probably still stretching her legs out of habit. “But figuring out what to do instead? That’s a whole new championship run!”

When it comes to paving the way for future female athletes, Bird notes how retirement actually has perks, and by sharing their stories, they might just inspire a fresh crop of ladies with gold medals to try their hand at podcasting, or maybe even reality TV. Dream big, kids; you have role models who can absolutely share how not to get paid for it!

Rapinoe, in her eloquent way, insists that future generations of female athletes deserve to compete as their “full selves.” Let’s be honest, as long as their full selves come packed with equal pay and respect, we’re all for it. “Being yourself is the goal for everybody!” she triumphantly declares. Why this didn’t come with a trophy is still unclear.

And while imparting wisdom to the youth, Bird emphasizes the importance of keeping “basketball the main thing.” Yes, kids, remember to keep your head in the game! Unless you’re LeBron, in which case, feel free to skip every workout imaginable and still end up on the cover of every magazine. The world is confusing.

Tune in for weekly updates from Bird and Rapinoe every Wednesday, where they’re not just adding to the “ecosystem of sports coverage” but also serving up a healthy side of wit and charm, because let’s face it, the world definitely needs a little of both. Who knew a podcast could be the modern soapbox for sports luminaries?