Four Governors Walk Into a Bar… and Try Not to Drink the Election Away!
VP Harris Wields Grocery Prices and Fascism in a Town Hall: ‘Choose Your Apocalypse Wisely!’
New York: Where Democrats and Republicans Fight Over Who Gets to Lose to New York City
House GOP Barking Up the Wrong Tree: Mace Threatens Subpoena, Claims Biden’s ‘Censorship’ is the Real Misinformation
Bezos Steals Spotlight: Post’s No-endorsement Decision Leaves Editorial Team in Shock Like Finding Out Amazon Prime Doesn’t Include Free Returns!
Nation’s Future: Choose Your Own Adventure—Now with More Plot Twists!
Kamala Harris Attempts Bipartisanship While Trump Plays Hide and Seek: U.S. Politics Enters ‘Find the Leader’ Season
Union Workers Distribute Ballots as Wisconsinites Wonder if Their Memories Are as Short as Their Attention Spans
Delta Sues CrowdStrike: When Your Cybersecurity Update Becomes a Flight Cancellation Special!
Bezos Steals Spotlight: Post’s No-endorsement Decision Leaves Editorial Team in Shock Like Finding Out Amazon Prime Doesn’t Include Free Returns!
David Einhorn Pedals Toward Profit: Can Peloton Spin Its Way From $6 to $31 on a Budget?
Coffee Chains Brew Cultural Capital: From Sipping to Socializing, Yemen’s Buzz Hits Wall Street!
Spirit Airlines Soars as It Sells the Skies and Cuts the Crew, Proving Less Really is More!
McDonald’s Shares Take a ‘Quarter Pounder’ Plunge After CDC Weighs In on Beefy E. coli Drama
Georgia Gets a Lottery Glow-Up: $478.2 Million Jackpot Turns Quick Mart into Cash Cow!
McDonald’s Sales Take a Sour Turn: E. Coli Outbreak Leaves Diners Flipping for Safety
WWE Faces the Ultimate Tag Team: Lawsuits and Unwanted Attention in a Ring of Scandal
CDC Recommends Pneumonia Vaccine for 50s—Because Who Needs a Healthy Retirement Anyway?
From Champion to Tragedy: South Florida’s New Season Kicks Off with a Heart-Wrenching Overtime
Bird Flu: The Only Flu That Makes You Wonder Who’s Really Flying the Coop
Online Gambling: Because Who Needs Jobs and Relationships When You Can Bet Your Life Away?
Ohtani’s 50th Home Run: Because Why Shouldn’t a Baseball Cost More Than Your House?
Onions Go on the Lam: Fast Food Chains Flee from E. Coli-Drenched Toppings
WNBA Finals: Where Basketball is Finally More Popular Than Watching Paint Dry on NFL’s Sunday Night
Nepotism Dribbles Into the NBA: Bronny James Follows Dad’s Footsteps, Breathlessly Catches Up Post-Cardiac Arrest
McDonald’s Aces New Health Trend: E. Coli Burgers Spark Nation-wide Diet Revolution!
Lake Van’s Shrinking Shores: Where Drought Meets a Microbialite Renaissance
[ad_1] In a shocking turn of events resembling the plot of a dystopian novel, the shores of…
Starmer Redefines ‘Working Class’: You’ve Got a Job, but Only if You Don’t Make Money from It!
[ad_1] Sir Keir Starmer has launched himself into the thrilling world of defining “working people,” a quest…
IDF Reflects on the Cost of War: 757 Casualties and Counting, but Who’s Keeping Score?
[ad_1] In a tragic twist of fate that redefines “job security,” former Chief Warrant Officer Mordechai Haim…
Election Games: Politicians Vote for Lawsuits, Citizens Still Waiting for a Ballot
[ad_1] In the latest episode of ‘Election Shenanigans: The Legal Edition,’ political parties have unleashed nearly 100…
Boeing’s Financial Flight: New CEO Seeks Union Peace While Striking at $1 Billion a Month!
[ad_1] Buckle up, folks! Boeing is taking us on a wild ride that’s less “fly high” and…
New Diabetes Drug Promises to Keep Your Brain Sharp—Just in Case You Forget Why You’re On It!
[ad_1] In a plot twist worthy of a medical soap opera, semaglutide—the celebrity ingredient found in the…
Trump Fries, Harris Celebrates: Fast Food Politics Takes a Deep Fry Dive!
[ad_1] In the latest episode of American Political Theatre, our former President Donald Trump donned an apron…
Trump and Harris: Two Circus Clowns Trying to Steal Each Other’s Balloons in a Shrinking Funhouse of Voters
[ad_1] In the grand carnival of American politics, where candidates are busy juggling demographics like flaming torches…
American Author Celebrates Life as Iranian Regime’s Hit List Gets a Plot Twist
[ad_1] In a plot twist befitting a dark comedy, federal prosecutors have decided to keep things interesting…
Kamala Harris Hosts College Block Parties to Convince Students That Voting is Cooler Than TikTok—Because Democracy Needs a DJ
[ad_1] In a stunning move that combines a love of college parties with a dash of political…
