Bird Flu: The Only Flu That Makes You Wonder Who’s Really Flying the Coop
Online Gambling: Because Who Needs Jobs and Relationships When You Can Bet Your Life Away?
Onions Go on the Lam: Fast Food Chains Flee from E. Coli-Drenched Toppings
McDonald’s Aces New Health Trend: E. Coli Burgers Spark Nation-wide Diet Revolution!
E. Coli Outbreak: McDonald’s Introduces the “Quarter Pounder with a Side of Regret”
Kids Coughing Up a Storm: Just Another Day of “Walking Pneumonia” Gone Wild!
Family of Shooter Aims to Clear His Name; Too Bad It’s a Case of Brain Over Blast
Quarter Pounder: Now Serving E. Coli with a Side of Regret
Amazon’s Same-Day Prescription Delivery: Because Why Wait to Get Your Anxiety Medication When You Can Stress Over Shipping Options?
[ad_1] Amazon is gearing up to rocket everyone’s daily dose of medicine straight into their homes—yes, folks,…
New Cervical Cancer Treatment Promises to Save Lives—Just in Time for the Next Round of ‘Why You Haven’t Been to the Doctor’ Excuses!
[ad_1] In a plot twist that would make any medical drama proud, researchers have discovered that adding…
Welcome to the Slim Shady: Where Obesity Drugs Are in Higher Demand Than the Gym Memberships We’ll Never Use!
[ad_1] In a picturesque suburban neighborhood that’s about as unassuming as a lukewarm cup of decaf coffee,…
Coca-Cola’s New Health Trend: ‘Zero Sugar’ Lemonade That You Can’t Drink If You’re Thirsty!
[ad_1] In a twist worthy of a soap opera plot, Coca-Cola has recalled over 13,000 cases of…
Doctors Discover the Real Cause of Your Unshakeable Confidence: A Rare Brain Condition Nicknamed ‘I-Know-Better-itis’
[ad_1] It turns out that some people aren’t just confidently wrong in arguments. They’re practically *celebrating* their…
IV Fluid Famine: Hospitals Postpone Elective Surgeries—Guess We’ll Just Have to Electively Breathe for a While!
[ad_1] In a gripping tale of modern medical mishaps, U.S. hospitals are now facing the dire crisis…
Weight-Loss Drugs Are Back! Just in Time for Everyone to Regain Their Enthusiasm and Not Their Waistlines!
[ad_1] Janet McCaskill might as well be the poster child for “diet du jour.” From WeightWatchers to…
BrucePac’s ‘Meat Your Maker’ Moment: 10 Million Pounds of Listeria-Infused Products Recalled—Because Who Needs a Healthy Dinner Anyway?
[ad_1] In an epic twist of irony worthy of a culinary horror movie, BrucePac, the gourmet purveyor…
Fisher-Price Recalls Infant Swings: Because Who Knew Swinging Babies Wasn’t an Olympic Sport?
[ad_1] Fisher-Price, the purveyor of playthings designed to make your life as a parent slightly more manageable,…
Online Pharmacy Promises Four-Hour Erection—But You Might Only Get Eight Hours in the Cemetery, Warns Feds
[ad_1] A woman thought she found a magical online pharmacy that would magically cure her pain with…
