Guardians Leave Yankees Crying in Extra Innings, Proving That Even in Sports, Teams Can Get Walked Over

CLEVELAND — In a dramatic turn of events that would leave even Shakespeare scratching his head, rookie pinch-hitter Jhonkensy Noel launched a tying homer with two outs in the ninth inning, propelling the Cleveland Guardians past the New York Yankees 7-5 on Thursday. This win moved the Guardians to a respectable 2-1 in the AL Championship Series, proving that team spirit and desperation can do wonders. All hail the underdog!

Cleveland, looking like a team destined for greatness or at least a decent nap, led 3-1 heading into the eighth. Then, in what must have been a scripted dramatic twist, Aaron Judge popped a two-run homer off All-Star closer Emmanuel Clase, who was probably starting to wonder if he should have taken up pottery instead. Giancarlo Stanton quickly followed suit with a solo shot, because, why not add insult to injury when you can?

With the Guardians down 5-3 and staring down the barrel of a 3-0 series deficit like a deer in the headlights, Lane Thomas doubled against Luke Weaver. Cue the emotional music! Noel, who despite sounding like a Christmas decoration managed to show up in June, crushed a majestic homer to tie it. He must have had a direct line to Santa for that good fortune!

In the 10th, Bo Naylor, because why not, decided to start the fun off with a single against Clay Holmes. Brayan Rocchio made a sacrifice, likely not to a god of baseball but rather the idea of strategy, taking a page out of “How to Advance a Runner 101.” Naylor inched to third base on a comebacker before David Fry, channeling his inner savior, sent a 1-2 sinker flying into the left-field bleachers. Because apparently, Cleveland’s bats were feeling extra generous today.

Fry’s swing transformed him into an instant hero, as if he’d just saved a puppy from a burning building, and the fans at Progressive Field erupted into cheers. Meanwhile, the Yankees were left pondering the meaning of life as they rallied for a group hug, probably trying to convince themselves it wasn’t that bad.

The Guardians can tie the series with another win on Friday, assuming they don’t trip over their own bats in the meantime.

Fry’s epic swing put an end to what will definitely be a cherished memory, perhaps even worthy of a Netflix documentary. The Guardians, the team that just won’t quit, were moments away from being on the receiving end of ‘could’ve-should’ve-would’ve’ when Noel, who incidentally is called Big Christmas, decided to stuff the Yankees’ stockings with coal.

This was reminiscent of the 2016 World Series yo-yo moment when Rajai Davis pulled off a similar stunt. As Noel rounded the bases, Progressive Field resembled a full-on rave, with fans dancing as if they were at a music festival instead of watching baseball.

Earlier, Judge and Stanton had taken turns playing ‘who can hit the ball harder,’ with Judge smacking a homer in Game 2. However, he spent most of October batting .143 (3 for 21) while striking out more than a bad stand-up comedian. But there’s nothing like crunch time to pull out a miraculous 99 mph cutter from Clase, which somehow cleared the wall. As Judge circled the bases, the Yankees poured out of their dugout like kids who just spotted candy in a piñata.

New York’s players were still basking in their pre-hug celebration when Stanton, ever the spoiler, decided to smash another homer off Clase. At this rate, Clase might as well start charging rent for all those home runs he’s been giving up.

New York had two on with no outs in the ninth, but managed to score just one lonely run, thanks to Gleyber Torres’ sacrifice fly—basically the baseball equivalent of ordering a salad when everyone else is having pizza. Eli Morgan ended the inning with a strikeout, sending Juan Soto home grumbling about life choices.

In a turn of events that shocked absolutely no one, rookie Kyle Manzardo hit a two-run homer in the third. The suspense and intrigue of this 30th postseason matchup between the Guardians and Yankees kept fans on the edge of their seats—mostly to get a better look at the absurdity unfolding.

Cleveland finally saw some length from a starter—Matthew Boyd managed five innings, the most any Cleveland manager has allowed this postseason. He served up two hits in the second before going on a 10-out streak with seven of those outs being the result of easy grounders. It seems like every game is becoming more of an epic saga, and at this rate, they’ll need a narrator to recount the nonsensical drama!