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In a plot twist straight out of a poorly-written soap opera, Mariel Garza, the head honcho of the Los Angeles Times’ editorial board, has thrown in the towel, signaling her outrage like a beleaguered character yelling “I’ll take my children and leave!” after her boss, billionaire doctor Patrick Soon-Shiong, slapped a big ol’ “no endorsement” sticker on her plans to back Kamala Harris for President. Because why not stir the pot a little?
“I am resigning because I want to make it clear that I am not okay with us being silent,” she told the Columbia Journalism Review as if silence wasn’t the most popular technique in corporate boardrooms everywhere. Here’s a hot take: when the going gets tough, it’s surprising how many people are “overwhelmed” by the “dangerous times” of being ignored.
The irony is rich here; this is the same paper that has enjoyed its fair share of Monday morning quarterbacking at every presidential race since it endorsed Obama back in ’08. Suddenly, their beloved editorial board has been rendered mute in the face of political craziness—talk about dramatic irony! Like a sitcom family deciding to stop doing family dinners because they can’t decide what to order.
According to Garza, the silent treatment wasn’t just a “whoopsies.” Most of their readers already have a “K-Hive” membership card and are high-fiving each other over their endorsements. “For the most part, our readers are Harris supporters,” she lamented, as if an endorsement from the Times could magically change California’s mind like an experimental potion in a bad fantasy novel. Spoiler alert: it probably wouldn’t.
Soon-Shiong, our resident billionaire with a flair for the melodramatic, decided to intervene. “Why don’t we just write a fancy report comparing the positive and negative aspects of both candidates?” he suggested from his ivory tower, imagining his punditry as the ultimate academic exercise. Because evidently, nothing screams “unbiased news” like turning endorsements into spreadsheet comparisons—cue the eye roll.
While the Times focused on its decision to avoid touching the presidential race (due to what we can only assume was an overwhelming case of cold feet), it is now left with a rather glaring absence. “It’s perplexing to readers, and possibly suspicious, that we didn’t endorse her this time,” Garza mused, as if this were a plotline twist in a telenovela rather than a hard-hitting editorial decision.
The Trump campaign, smelling blood in the water, quickly jumped on the lack of endorsement like a cat on a laser pointer, declaring it a “humiliating blow” for Harris. Oh yes, let’s fan those flames – because nothing says “presidential excellence” quite like a game of political kickball.
Garza, in a heartfelt resignation letter not dissimilar to a character exiting stage left for a dramatic monologue, expressed her personal turmoil over their silence and her realization that maybe, just maybe, endorsements could matter after all. “In these dangerous times, staying silent isn’t just indifference; it is complicity,” she declared like the heroine of a suspense novel realizing she’s locked in with the villain.
If only we could get a chuckle out of corporate silence and political theater. But alas, in the circus that is the financial world, the clowns often seem to be the only ones in on the joke.
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