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In a classic case of “better late than never,” Simon Bouie and his comrades have finally received a formal “sorry, our bad!” from the legal system over six decades after they sat down at a whites-only lunch counter in South Carolina. Back in 1960, Bouie made the kind of promise every mother loves—a vow to avoid trouble—before promptly getting himself arrested for daring to sit in a place designated solely for the paler-skinned patrons, because who doesn’t love a little irony with their cup of coffee?
Fast forward to Friday, where a judge dutifully signed an order to wipe the arrests from their records, presumably using a giant eraser as a symbolic gesture against the chaos of systemic racism. One can only imagine the judge’s deep understanding of how absurd it is to hold onto records of a time when it was deemed criminal to want equality. Meanwhile, Bouie recalled a time when the governor was ready to pop a blood vessel warning Black college students against getting too chummy with those hot-headed agitators— you know, the ones who dreamt of a world where they were treated like actual humans. How quaint!
As they strolled unsteadily into the courtroom, canes in hand, Bouie and fellow activist Charles Barr embodied the phrase “standing strong against oppression” but with more limping involved. Over five decades later, it turns out jail time for sitting down was a trend that really caught on—so much so that a mere two of their original crew are still upright and breathing, while the others were represented in court by delicate white roses, because nothing says “I was a martyr for justice” quite like floral tributes.
And if you thought the tales of their youthful courage were light-hearted, wait until you hear of Rep. Jim Clyburn, who met his wife in jail. Ah, romance amid civil disobedience! Because nothing says “I love you” like shared handcuffs and a few nights in the slammer.
Professor Bobby Donaldson’s poetic eulogy for the deceased revolutionaries sounded more like a graduation speech than a tribute, waxing lyrical about how they were “victimized” in one era and “vindicated” in another—a social twist that only the most ironic of storytellers could conjure. Hell, even the U.S. Supreme Court eventually got in on the action, tossing out their convictions just days before the Civil Rights Act of 1964 was signed, creating a perfect historical backdrop: “We’re sorry for the mess, but it’s too late for specifics!”
Solicitor Byron Gipson, the designated hero of this feel-good fairy tale, wasn’t above pointing out the bravery it took to “sit” in the face of adversity. Yes, because standing up against injustice is so passé—everyone knows that the new brave move is to sit down and stay seated through life’s biggest challenges. It’s the ultimate act of rebellion.
Bouie’s final quip about his wife threatening to report him back to Richland County court for marital mischief was as punchy as it was tragic. “You think you’re in trouble now, buddy? Just wait till I make that phone call!” Now, there’s a lasting legacy of civil rights: one fight for equality only to be replaced by the ongoing battle for a peaceful dinner conversation at home. What a time to be alive!
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